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If you ever hurt someone ...
Some withdraw injured, others go off - everyone reacts differently to insults, but they always hurt. We reveal what really helps ...
Ouch, that hurts! The sweetheart does not have a look for the new hairstyle . The nice neighbor "forgot" to ask us for a birthday coffee. There are countless situations that we find offensive . They all have one thing in common: They hit us unprepared, like a slap in the face. The impression remains that they are not respected, not understood and not appreciated.
"An insult is a slap in the face for the soul, " says the psychotherapist and bestselling author Bärbel Wardetzki ( "Please do not take it personally, " Kösel-Verlag, 12.99 euros ). "It directly affects our self-esteem." But Wardetzki is also encouraging. "We are not subject to insults helplessly", so their thesis.
Even more: "We can learn to influence ourselves, if something offends us." Let's take the birthday coffee of the neighbor: Who says she wanted to exclude us? Maybe she's too shy to just ring the doorbell - or had a stressful day and so did not think of us. "Often a hurt affects a point where we are very sensitive, " says the psychologist.
So, when we've often felt rejected in the past, a forgotten invitation weighs even harder - and is considered an attack. The result is negative, agonizing feelings that do not help solve the problem. Wardetzki therefore advises to deliberately work through situations that we find offensive. So we can not only overcome the current insults, but also strengthen our soul for the future.
