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Reconcile with your childhood!


Photo: © Jutta Klee / Corbis
content
  1. psychology
  2. 1. Buried old reproaches
  3. 2. Put yourself in the parents
  4. 3. Write a farewell letter
  5. 4. See positive features
  6. 5. Awaken memories
  7. Book Recommendation

psychology

The experiences of the past shape us for the whole life. But sometimes we have negative experiences from childhood until today in the way - that does not have to stay that way. Reconcile with your childhood - for a fresh start to the future!

1. Buried old reproaches

Of course, you can have a lifetime of rage at your father for leaving the family or demanding recognition from the emotionally cold mother - but it will not get you any further.

Instead, frustration and annoyance will eat away forever. Consider: Will I really keep the old bills open? If you forgive, it does not have to happen for the sake of your parents. Do it for yourself - to be free. As you will see, when you finally bury your grudge, you will regain a lot of energy .

2. Put yourself in the parents

Become aware of how your parents became the people they were or are. Most of them did not have ideal childhood themselves, had to cope with much heavier conditions than we did ourselves.

It pays to ask your parents once in a quiet hour about their own childhood . With this background knowledge, it is easier to absolve father and mother from their mistakes and let go.

3. Write a farewell letter

To conclude with the past, helps a "farewell letter" to the parents. In it you can write about the soul, what has made you angry or sad, what you resent mother or father, what you regret, etc. End so that you take responsibility for your life from now on.

You can then burn the letter in a farewell ritual, take it to your parents' grave, or throw it into a river.

4. See positive features

As critical as you see your parents: Often there is something positive even in negative qualities, eg. For example, in the stinginess the thrift, in the fear the caution, in the effervescent being a piece of aliveness, etc.

Think about which of these positive qualities you have inherited from your parents . Perhaps your difficult childhood made you especially independent, courageous or patient. You can use these resources!

5. Awaken memories

Unfortunately, we often only recall those childhood situations that were particularly painful. But there were certainly moments of happiness and well-being.

Therefore, remember all the situations that have brought you fun and joy. Also think of people you like, such as a neighbor or grandmother. These memories give strength and help to better cope with problems.

Book Recommendation

More suggestions can be found in Ulrike Dahm's guide "Closing peace with childhood", Schirner Verlag, 8.95 euros.

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