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- We interviewed an expert
- Do children feel the story of Santa Claus as a lie?
- How can parents explain it?
- Children like to accept it
We interviewed an expert
Every year, parents tell their children again that Santa Claus puts presents under the Christmas tree. But what happens to the children when they learn that they have been lied to by their parents? Is it even a lie? We interviewed an expert.
Can you still remember the moment when you learned that Santa does not exist? Me, yes. It was a cold day in January, Christmas was just over. I was six years old and I started to wonder if it was possible for an old man to bring presents to all the children.
When I asked my parents about it, I just wanted to have a confirmation. I wanted to hear that I did not need to doubt that the miracle of Santa really does exist. But instead came an answer that shook me: There really is not Santa Claus!
So slowly it dawned on me why my father always went back when we were on Christmas Eve in the direction of the church. It was he who put the presents under the Christmas tree and not Santa! Although my parents have taught me gently, I can remember exactly how sad and disappointed I was then. The tension and magic around Santa Claus were suddenly gone.
Do children find Santa's story a lie?
What happens to children when they learn that Santa Claus does not exist? Are you disappointed that you have been lied to for many years? After all, parents should teach their children that they can rely on their parents. They should develop trust in what the parents tell them. How does it fit together?
We have the graduate psychologist and family therapist dr. Klaus Neumann asked if it really is a lie when telling children about Santa Claus. He says that the question is as old as Santa Claus himself and it shows the parental effort that they always want to do everything right. "Here is not a lie, but told according to age - the child has grown bigger understands that Santa Claus is a symbol for so much and not necessarily real. If parents do not lie in everyday life, there may be some fairy tales at Christmas, Easter, etc. ".
How can parents explain it?
Children understand when they get older that Santa is not real. Dr. advises. Neumann that parents could tell their children the following: "Santa Claus is a character from a great story about Christmas, a symbol that stands for something: for the Christian idea of charity, giving, security with others, etc. Santa Claus changes shape - for a small child he is definitely there, for a bigger child - like you - he becomes a legendary figure. Nobody has ever seen real Santa Claus, but everyone talks about him and gives himself beautiful things or beautiful feelings in his name. "
And may parents tell their children that Santa Claus is only bringing presents to good children? No, that's really not appropriate. "Give parents, because they love and care for their children and that is independent of good intermediate consumption" Dr. Neumann.
Children like to accept it
So it's not so bad for kids to hear Santa's story and eventually realize that it does not exist. Dr. Neumann says: "Children like to accept this, because they feel that their parents want to do them good with the symbol Santa Claus."
And I, too, finally got over it. Not only do I remember the frightening moment when I learned that Santa Claus does not exist - but also the magic, the excitement, the excited imagination that I associate with Santa Claus. And that was a nice time!
We thank Dr. Ing. Neumann for the interview!
Dr. Klaus Neumann, psychologist
Talk therapist + Systemic family therapist
Representative for child welfare + children's rights in the BDP (Professional Association of German Psychologists + Psychologists)
Member of the section Political Psychology in the BDP
Deisenhofen street 44
81539 Munich
Tel .: 089 - 696306
E-Mail:
(WW3)
