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A young woman was raped. Known people blame her.
In a club Sandra was raped from Stuttgart. On her blog, she talks about how acquaintances blamed her for the rape.
"Two years ago, I had to have a painful experience. During a disco visit drugs were mixed into my alcohol-free (!) Drink and a guy took advantage of it. I was completely beside myself, unable to think straight and my head felt like an explosion. It was not until the evening that I realized what had happened: I was raped . "
Sandra from Stuttgart did not want to be silent anymore. On her blog "anormaldisaster" she tells of the worst night of her life, the night of her rape . In a club she was stunned and abused by a stranger. That alone was bad, but for Sandra, the reactions of her friends were even worse when she told them about the incident.
"You should think that right now the time has come for people to stand by one. Try to support you. Unfortunately I have to disappoint you, because most of you will look horrified and ask questions that make you despair: Why did not you pay attention to your drink? Did you have to dress XY again with the neckline? You know that with your big breasts you are attracting such attention as well? How can you blame him for wanting to eat a big-breasted blonde? "
It is awful, but it happens again and again. Rape victims are awarded a complicity . Known, friends or defenders of the perpetrators accuse them of having provoked such a crime by their appearance, their clothing or their behavior. Not always direct, usually rather subtle, through appropriate questions. The impact of such doubtful questions on opera can be devastating.
Sandra says, "I believed it for a long time. I thought it was up to me. I thought I was partly to blame. A girl once told me that I was way too pretty and that's why it happened to me. I would have liked to put myself immediately in another body, if only because I could have. "
For two years she tried in various ways to deal with what happened and the gloomy thoughts. Sometimes she went to celebrate excessively, sometimes not at all. She pondered a great deal, wondering if it was really her own fault that a man could not resist, abusing her against her will. Then she drew a border.
"It took me two years to get to that point. Two years due to a night. Time has changed me and I will certainly not be able to make friends with discos so easily. But I know now that I was not to blame. Even if I run down the street naked, nobody has the right to harass or rape me. Nobody has the right to tell me what to wear with my cup size and what not. Nobody ever has the right to touch me against my will. "
We are glad that Sandra was able to shake off the doubt. Because one thing is certain: a deep cleavage, a seductive smile or a short skirt are many, but certainly not an invitation to rape!
