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Confident - for the career

Anyone who appears confident promotes his career. But often that's easier said than done ...
Photo: Squaredpixels / iStock

What needs self-confident appearance? Good thoughts + good gestures

Who wants to make a career, must prevail. We have tips for you on how to develop a confident demeanor and convince you better.

Only when body and head speak the same language, we can convince.

Have you often been annoyed because you did not say anything at the conference, even though you have so much on your mind? That others score with your ideas, because you dare not bring them? We give tips for a self-confident appearance, how you can gradually reduce inhibitions and speak freely.

Ask friends

Those who want to speak to others safely need a good self-esteem and a realistic assessment of their strengths and weaknesses.

"Mostly our self-image is much more negative than what others think of us, " says communication expert Claudia Ludwig. So we ask good friends how they perceive us. And you'll probably be surprised how positive you see us. After all, you have good reasons to be friends with us. That gives courage!

"We should never compare with others, but should always work to get better, " says Ludwig. "Especially to make us feel good."

Lead book

Anyone who feels good documents this with words, with gestures. "So I realize what I've already done and what I'm really good at, " says Ludwig.

It's best to create your own, very personal success journal. For example, in a nice (yes!) Notebook, we write down: "I raised my two daughters on my own, I made my father's last months as nice as possible, and I paid off our little house, even though I had to do without much." If that is not a success story!

Be realistic

We will never be perfect, no matter how hard we prepare ourselves. Shall we not? It's about being good!

For this you have to prepare thoroughly, both technically and thematically. And eventually make the decision: "Now I have done everything necessary!"

When this good feeling sets in, one can confidently come to the lectern and be self-confident . And always remember: you stand there because others trust you!

Reduce fear

"It is important to recognize the causes of our inhibitions, " says Ludwig. To remember situations that were unpleasant. Has somebody ever said something to me that got me out of my mind? Why did that hurt me so much? Only when you know why, do you solve fears.

Make your own courage

When nervousness arises, repeat like a mantra, "I'm calm, focused." Or: "I have prepared very well, everything is fine." The sentences should be short. Then other thoughts get no place. Works!


Safe appearance and inner strength complement each other.

In public, body language emphasizes our impact. You can easily train them at home in front of the mirror or with video recordings. For example, make a small speech while watching your own posture, gestures and facial expressions. This is how we train our self-perception and can specifically pick out aspects that we want to change.

The steady state shows strength

In upright posture both legs have firm contact with the ground. We take care not to cross them. The feet are hip-width apart and parallel. If you spring in your knees now, you can even feel this good grounding.

The arms hold you at waist level, either sideways or at a small distance in front of the body. You will notice quickly, with the attitude changes the consciousness.

The confident gang

Fast pace and medium stride demonstrate self-assurance and competence. Stressed slow walking with long strides on the other hand dampens the excitement. People who run through a room convey that they want to get over their performance quickly. The audience immediately realizes that.

In public places or street cafés we can test how much attention we can stand. It is helpful to practice with your head held up and a smile on your lips.

To increase the level of difficulty, we next practice looking for eye contact with a person. Who looks longer in the eyes of others looks more confident. You can do that first with friends.

The right handshake

He is the best start for a sympathetic start of conversation and shows, rightly executed, immediate drive.

We're training him with a girlfriend, covering her the whole palm, not just the fingertips. We do not exert extra pressure, nor do we pass a lax, almost lifeless hand.

The arm is moved out of a 90 degree posture, similar to sawing. So you keep the direction and energy of his greeting and avoids that the other person sees himself depressed or forced to "graceful hand kiss".

The charming smile

A real smile is always an invitation. Direct eye contact results in sudden glare in the eyes. The fine lines around the eye area are visible in wrinkles.

We want to be able to retrieve this effect. If you think of something nice while practicing, you will find that your facial expression brightens instantly.

If you lower your head slightly and look up for a moment, you seem girlish. If we want to keep our smile shy, we lower our heads and eyes.

More offensive is a "broad" smile with the head slightly to the side.

The right gestures

Small gestures effectively support speech: they stimulate the flow of thoughts and make it easier for listeners to better absorb our message.

"Round" gestures work harmoniously. Jerky hand movements can irritate. Great gestures, which let concepts become pictorial, are consciously used sparingly.

The thumb is splayed because he is holding his hand. The index finger is completely deleted from the repertoire, he has an obtrusive reminder. To show things or people, we use the whole hand.

Convince while sitting

We move the chair a bit off the table so we can use gestures without "fumbling" right in front of our faces. The arms are at most up to the elbows on the table, in this way small gestures remain feasible.

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