Photo: Imago / Spöttel Picture
After 15 years of marriage
TV star Karin Thaler (47) and musician Milos Malesevic (45) avoid the limelight and love their harmonious life. The most important thing for the actress ("Rosenheim-Cops"): her peace of mind. How she gets it and what her husband contributes to it, she tells us in an interview.
Currently the 12th season of the "Rosenheim-Cops" can be seen. What does success mean to you?
Karin Thaler: The series is a great safety for me. As a woman in her mid-40s in this profession, I'm realistic. It is not self-evident to have so much to do.
Many actors struggle with existential fears. Do you know the feeling too?
Karin Thaler: Yes. I advise young actors to go into this profession at the moment. My niece Julia is 18 and wants to be an actress. She would be very suitable of the type and her kind.
What do you recommend to her?
Karin Thaler: I took her one day to shoot, in the hope that she will put off the high stint. But she really liked it. In television, the workload has doubled in the last 20 years. The fees are pressed. Often no travel costs or overnight stays are paid. I see no great development opportunities as an actor in Germany. Many well-known actors did not have a single shooting day this year.
It's different with you. They are still shooting "Hubert & Staller".
Karin Thaler: Yes. I was fortunate enough to always live from my job. With me there was no big hype - I had constant inquiries. I am very happy and thankful.
No dry spells?
Karin Thaler: Only one. In 1995 I did not receive any more inquiries for half a year. I've been in business for almost ten years.
How did you feel about that?
Karin Thaler: That made me very unsure. When I started shooting again, I had the feeling that I'd never been in front of the camera, starting from scratch.
You once said that when acting is no longer possible you still have the painting.
Karin Thaler: Yes. But for a few years I miss the muse and the time. I have to prepare for my shoots, learn a lot of lyrics - even on vacation I squeeze one hour off every day.
What do you treat yourself to in your free time?
Karin Thaler: Once a year I take an Ayurveda cure. I detoxify and detoxify and so bring body, mind and soul in line. I also drive with my girlfriends on a short break. And now and then I'll get a nice bag.
How do you recharge your batteries?
Karin Thaler: I am no longer a workaholic like I used to be. I am very disciplined - always punctual and prepared. At the same time, I also enjoy doing nothing, for example on public holidays. Sleep well, take care of your body, go to the sauna, have a good meal, relax and meet friends - that's the best way to recover.
Do you still have stage fright?
Karin Thaler: Yes, whenever a new shooting block begins. Especially when a new director is on the set. I then sleep badly and ask myself: can I still manage it, can I still do it, is everything going well? I have a high demand on myself. Before every flap my pulse goes up. All senses are sharpened, I am fully focused. If I got through well at the first flap, the stage fright is gone. When I played drama, I had freak stage fright before every performance - that's why I rarely do it.
You have had these self-doubts before.
Karin Thaler: Yes, they come again and again. But not only in the job. Also, I often wonder if I have acted correctly. Many actors have self-doubt. Marilyn Monroe had little self-confidence. She never felt at eye level with other actors, did not find her work good enough, always wanted to be better. I recognize myself in it. After all, women want to be loved. But I did not have more self-doubt than others. That's nothing that has influenced my life.
You are married for 15 years. What is your relationship?
Karin Thaler: We do not lead a fake life for others. We are at peace with us. Peace of mind is the most important thing for me.
Have you found your peace of mind?
Karin Thaler: 90 percent. Life is up and down. There are always problems and difficulties. When I get hurt, it keeps me busy for a long time - even if the other person did not feel it was an injury. I am not quickly offended and can control well what hits me and what does not. Nevertheless, I want to be at peace with everything so that I have peace of mind.
The "Marie" is resolute. Is she more explorer than you are private?
Karin Thaler: Yes, we are different. "Marie" is consistent, straight out. I am also direct, but "Marie" carries her heart on the tongue and immediately says her opinion.
You do not see your husband that often. Are you trying to avoid quarrels?
Karin Thaler: No, you can do that, but unfortunately you can not control it. If there is an important issue, it must be addressed - even at Christmas. Because once everything has dammed, it breaks out of one.
What are you arguing about?
Karin Thaler: About smoking - I smoke, he does not. Actually, I wanted to turn it off, but I always smoke again. My husband then worries about my health.
They both love each other a lot.
Karin Thaler: Yes. This is a deep, true love. When my husband is traveling, I wait for his call that he has landed well, and worry me: Is he alright, does he eat neatly, does he drink enough water? I feel like he has always been part of my life. Nobody is as close to me as he is.
Do you find it a pity that you can not spend so much time together?
Karin Thaler: We are so used to it because it has always been that way. My husband is a musician and plays mostly on the weekend. During this time I take care of my friendships, visit my family or relax. During the week, we have plenty of time to do something or go away spontaneously.
How often is your husband on the way?
Karin Thaler: He used to be on ferries for four to six weeks. Now he's gone for two, three days or just over the weekend. In terms of the year, we spend more quality time together than other couples.
Would you work less to have more time for each other?
Karin Thaler: Yes, but only in a few years. I am still fit and curious. As long as it goes well, I want to work a lot. I have another 20 years until retirement. Who knows what the times will be later. I want to take care of that.
Are you jealous when your husband is on tour?
Karin Thaler: That was only a problem in the first years of our relationship. We were both jealous. This is also normal when you are fresh together. Now we are not anymore. We want to leave the other one as he is. We are happy, cheerful and want to have fun. But that has its limits - we do not have to say that, that's clear to us. Otherwise we do not have to choose each other.
They have no children. How are you doing?
Karin Thaler: My husband and I are missing nothing. I did not want to become a mother. First it was stressful for me at work, then it would not have happened, since we both were traveling a lot. We always said "later". But somehow the topic never really came to the table. A child needs time, means a lot of responsibility. It's not that easy either financially.
You have a godchild for that.
Karin Thaler: Denise is 20. She is the daughter of my best friend. I have watched intensely how she grew up. Today she often sends SMS to me if we want to do something.
And you are two times aunt ...
Karin Thaler: Yes. My sister has two girls. They are 18 and 9. Last winter we were together in Austria, they still rave about it today.
Is your sister jealous that you get along so well with the children?
Karin Thaler: Just in the fun. We always play that she is jealous. Then she says to her big "yes, yes, you and your aunt" and winks at me. As an aunt I can deal with the children much cooler because I'm not the guardian. For her I am the "wild aunt" (laughs). We get along great, are like girlfriends.
And how do you relate with your sister?
Karin Thaler: Very good. That was not always so. When we were little, we argued a lot. My sister and I have had different ideas about life. But it's not like she's the stuffy mother and I'm just doing Halligalli all the time. However, I have more energy because I have no children. My sister is 45 and very teen. She loves to dance and celebrate.
Do you like going out too?
Karin Thaler: Yes. I was young at heart. My godchild likes to go away with me, then we celebrate until four o'clock in the morning.
Remember when celebrating that you have grown older?
Karin Thaler: That's it. Afterwards I need two days to regenerate. Sometimes all my bones hurt from dancing. It used to be normal to go for a drink after turning with the team. They stayed away until three o'clock in the morning, had to get out again the next morning at seven, and kept turning. This is no longer possible today. I do not look so fresh anymore either. The skin "wrinkles" worse than before. The body gives me signals that I've gotten older. That's why I'm disciplined when I'm in filming.
They are 47 and are slowly approaching 50.
Karin Thaler: When I see the "Rosenheim Cops" from ten years ago, I think, "Wow, was that me? Did you look cute? "I had not thought of myself. There is always something that bothers you - the stomach, the double chin, the hair. Why did not I enjoy that at the time, to have looked so young and great?
And how do you feel now?
Karin Thaler: I feel fit. I am satisfied with myself. Someone I see on TV is only 35, but looks like my mother - and she's 70 (laughs). Nevertheless, it's funny to get the mirror held up. In ten years' time, it will again be that I see a sequence of today and say satisfied: "Compared to now I looked great."
Are you afraid of getting older?
Karin Thaler: Not at all. Main thing, I stay healthy. If I'm shorter, I would like to travel and enjoy my life. But I do everything to stop the signs of time.
What exactly do you do?
Karin Thaler: I did not do any plastic surgery or have a Botox injection. But I try to maintain what the jars give (laughs). I swear on scrubs and masks. I can not stop time - many women would feel better if they accepted that.
Why?
Karin Thaler: Some are really mutilated by operations. They seem to look younger, but they just look weird. Even if a beauty surgery is done well, something is wrong. Meg Ryan, for example - it's a pity what happened to her face. The worst example is Sydne Rome, which I saw live. She was beautiful before.
Many actors go under the knife to continue to get roles.
Karin Thaler: But if the face is like a grimace, it does not work. The charisma grows when you are at peace with yourself. My grandma always said, "When you are old, you get the face you deserve." I often think about it. I try to find my inner peace. For people who are full of life and have something to talk about, you do not pay attention to every wrinkle. One looks into the soul through the eyes and is fascinated. Such a charisma is my goal. When I achieve that, I am satisfied.
Would you have a beauty surgery done?
Karin Thaler: Not really. Except, I get a loophole - that would be a big break for me as an actress. I would have that corrected.
And would you let yourself be injected with Botox?
Karin Thaler: For God's sake! The idea of someone injecting me with a needle into my forehead or into my lips is the horror. I am afraid that a nerve will be hurt. I have retained the healthy attitude to life, not to join in this beauty.
Speaking of health. Is cancer screening important to you?
Karin Thaler: My gynecologist reminds me to have a mammogram taken regularly. But I do not run to the doctor with every ache. Since I have already caught such a cold that I can not breathe. If you are not seriously ill, our immune system is stronger than you think.
Do not take any tablets?
Karin Thaler: I'm against taking a pill for everything right now. For example, a slight headache. Most of the time the body does it on its own - even if it takes longer. This is the healthier way and hardens a bit.
Is your husband pigheaded when he has a cold?
Karin Thaler: A little bit. If he has infected me, I have to nurse him more than he cares for me (laughs).
What are your hopes for the future?
Karin Thaler: to have work. But most of all to stay healthy. If I am not so mobile in old age, I would move at any time into a house with "supervised living". I would have a room with my husband. Or everyone would have their own four walls, like Nadja and Walter Giller.
What advantages would that have?
Karin Thaler: It is being washed and cooked for me. And yet I could continue to do something with my friends, go to the café or to the spa. I could also imagine moving to a shared apartment for older people in the south, to Spain. We have not planned anything specifically yet. But now and then my husband and I talk about it.
Would not you hang on your home?
Karin Thaler: We have a gallery apartment, to which a staircase goes up. You could install a stairlift, but even then you will not be able to get up later. I'd rather get used to the idea of someday not being able to stay in the flat. I see that quite realistically: I do not want to burden anyone who has to take care of me.
Have you ever talked about a living will?
Karin Thaler: We have already regulated this ten years ago.
Even your will?
Karin Thaler: Yes, we already did that at the notary. We had it reworked when we bought an apartment. I think it's important to have everything arranged, because we both travel a lot for work. Something can always happen - even to both of us at the same time. If we both had an accident and I die five minutes in front of my husband, the entire fortune would be transferred to him and redistributed as soon as he dies. Now we have everything arranged so that our two families benefit - no matter who dies when and how. You have to take care of that in good time.
Do you think much about death?
Karin Thaler: No. I do not care that my husband or I could die. I live in the now. My husband and I discussed how to settle the legacies. Now everything is in the towel and the subject of death is off the table.
