Good intentions also implement
Going to sports, cleaning out the closet, making a tax return - if you find it difficult to tackle annoying things, you are among the twelve million Germans who suffer from chronic cervicitis. That annoys you?
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- Which type of postponement are you?
- See the horror in the face
- Stop mind reading
- Be realistic
- Pick out tasks
- Avoid distractions
- Motivate instead of self-destruct
- Venture out of the comfort zone
- Banish negative thoughts
- Communicate directly
- Learn to say no
- Stand by your weakness
- Find the middle ground
- Prevent excessive demands
- Get support
- To become active
- Decide change
Everything will be different next time! The tax return is due by the end of January. The presentation for the office will be completed the day before the presentation. And the TV will be turned off at 22 o'clock in the future. The intentions are - and then? Find yourself regularly in the typical displacement and avoidance loop again.
Learn in our Psychotest which Aufschiebe-type you are (6 pictures):
"It's like being in the car to a destination and then turning off at the last moment, " explains Dr. Monica Ramirez Basco, psychologist at the University of Texas ("Stop procrastinating: how to start today, stop postponing", Huber Verlag, around 20 euros). However, as a procrastinator (from lat. Procrastinare: postponing, postponing), you are far from satisfied. Researchers at the Wilhelms University Münster assume that up to 15 percent of Germans postpone this chronically.
However, this avoidance attitude is punished immediately with a guilty conscience, we consider ourselves then lazy, irresponsible and useless. The consequences are lousy mood, frustration, in the worst case even burnout or depression. Once your self-esteem suffers from your postponement, you should change something. "You can turn off your behavior with a few small tricks, " says Ramirez Basco.
Which type of postponement are you?
First, find out which type of delay you are and then find out which strategies you will use in the future. But read everything, because each of us has several facets. The expert: "The urge to postpone will not disappear suddenly. But try to procrastinate less today than yesterday and tomorrow less than today. "Use the tricks as often as possible - you will soon experience first successes and a new lightness of being.
Did you find out with the test above which type of postponement you are? On the following pages you will learn more about the different types.
Type 1 - The Avoidress
You can hardly confess to your best friend separation from your partner because you fear allegations. Or you put the end of the month on the long bench, so as not to do anything wrong - until the pressure to take over is overpowering
See the horror in the face
You have "such a feeling" that something goes out badly? This is anxiety, one of the common reasons for cervicalitis. "But just because the scariest option seems plausible at first does not mean it's the most likely one, " says Ramirez Basco. So instead of just listening to your gut, getting more information and asking others about their experiences. And also allow positive predictions on how you will achieve your goal!
Stop mind reading
Are you afraid of creating a bad mood? You do not even know what's going on in your head! "Rely on facts instead of letting your actions be guided by speculation, " says the expert. Expressing fears ("I do not want you to be disappointed with me, but I have something to tell you"). Do not start from the worst, but ask ("Are you sad because I left my friend?").
Do not immerse yourself in black painting, but consider whether you do not over-interpret the reaction of others. Do not wait for the right mood "Duties can be done even if you are in a bad mood, " says the psychologist. "Consider three reasons why it would be a good idea to get active.
Take out the reason that matters most to you. Repeat it for a minute in silence, so solidifies your intent. Effective too: Explain to another person why you will not push this thing to pass. "Ideal: Reserve one hour a week strictly for completing unpleasant things!
Type 2- The Planless
If you're supposed to take the tax, you're guaranteed to hang on to other important things: sorting photos in your computer, cleaning windows, and finally getting in touch with an old friend. The real goal? Will be until just before just getting lost
Be realistic
Badly organized people think they have time, and they like to escape theories like "Under pressure, I can work better". But they always fall on the nose. Probate's antidote: very specific schedules with small, realistic intermediate goals. Write this on a piece of paper and place it in sight. As soon as you digress, read out loud and say phrases like "I can do it, if I take enough time" or "I do not think it will take that long, but I better play it safe and start now".
Pick out tasks
Always focus on one thing and set clear priorities. What needs to be done first and why? Then note the order in which you will complete your tasks. Always keep an eye on the note and paint something done. That motivates us to continue!
Avoid distractions
Just five seconds to digress to seriously affect your work. If you have to finish something, eliminate all sorts of confounding factors: switch off the Internet browser and mobile phone! Work at an empty desk, even background music or a running TV reduce your ability to concentrate. Keep reminding yourself that you can do just one job at a time.
Type 3- The self-doubter
You should take on an important project in your job and think, "Am I good enough for that?" Or "I'm definitely embarrassed." For fear and insecurity, you'd rather let it go
Motivate instead of self-destruct
Disarm such negative sentences ("I always think so when I have stress") and then activate motivating thoughts that have helped you before ("I have to do this now, then I'm proud of myself", " I'll do it, no matter how it gets "). Also, think about what you are convinced of in good times ("I'm smart, " "I can do it").
Venture out of the comfort zone
Only those who venture into new terrain, gain self-confidence! Instead of spending hours thinking about what might go wrong, just start! "To reassure you, you can always recall opportunities in which you became active and everything went well, " advises the expert.
Banish negative thoughts
Decisions like to delay self-doubters until they have settled themselves by deadline deletion. Instead of letting your thoughts revolve around bad experiences with each new challenge, you should realize how often you've mastered the difficult, the unfamiliar, the unpleasant. You will see that your self-doubts are far less justified than you initially think.
Type 4 - The Harmony Addict
Arrangements, requests and requests - whether at work or privately - are accepted by you without contradiction, but remain unsettled for the time being. They always want to please everyone, do not give anyone a rebuff. A clear no is usually very difficult for you
Communicate directly
Talk plain text! Force yourself to always say in the future if something does not suit you! With that your fellow human beings will get along much better than you might think.
Learn to say no
You get bogged down in multiple tasks at the same time because you just can not say no. This is due to your fear of disappointing someone if you refuse his request. Exercise to be more offensive and to stand by your no. Start with someone who is likely to respond positively.
Practice what you want to say in front of the mirror. Do not become aggressive, do not repeat yourself, and above all, do not apologize for your open demeanor. Wait for the reactions of your counterpart for the time being, they usually do not turn out as negative as feared. Sentences such as "Not this time, but ask me again next time" or "I do not have time to really care" facilitate a no.
Stand by your weakness
Many of your colleagues and friends appreciate that you are so helpful, enjoy this positive character trait! However, your care should not be detrimental to yourself and prevent you from completing your tasks as planned. So set clear priorities and then pull that plan through consistently.
Type 5 - The workaholics
They work under high pressure, help with moves, jump in as a babysitter - until you run out of breath. But does it even make sense to squander your powers like that? Many things are left undone for you, because you simply lack the energy to do so
Find the middle ground
Perfectionists are quickly overwhelmed and often give up before they start. Define small intermediate goals. Consider: Is a disadvantage to be expected if your work product is not perfect? And what's worse: not achieving the goal perfectly or not at all? Find a compromise solution, screw back your exaggerated claims.
Prevent excessive demands
If the excitement of new, exciting tasks is enormous, it has a rewarding effect and is addictive. But overload junkies also often paralyzing excessive demands. At the next urge to start something new, you should do the following: "Stop and take ten deep breaths, " advises psychologist Ramirez Basco. Then ask yourself seriously: why do I even want to do that? Does it have to be now? What is left - with a higher priority? Then wait 24 hours. You still want to get started? Then do it, with realistic targets. Otherwise, just let it be!
Get support
What good is it for you if you want to do everything yourself, but time is wasted? Ask for help more often ("Could you take on this task for me? I will gladly return the favor at the next opportunity")! The Expert: "Other people do not consider it a sign of weakness to be needed by you.
Rather, they feel it is something positive that will help them get their revenge on you or help them out, even if you've helped them out. "Let's help you and learn to give up control and responsibility - that's how you manage it the upcoming challenges in the time frame available to you.
Type 6 - the fun seeker
Only one more episode "Breaking Bad", only five minutes left, only one more drink with the best friend. The laziness wins you too fast - until everything becomes ultra-short
To become active
When the guilty conscience is pressing, gently set the forward gear by first considering arguments as to why it would be good to go from pleasure to work now. Then you make that step the easiest for you. Even if it was just something simple, for example, you have cleared your desk to organize your application documents better - praise it!
Decide change
Tell yourself the reasons why you want to change! Then start in stages to break the old habits. Plan specifically (make tax by the end of January, vacuum every Friday) and gradually get more done promptly. Be patient:
Studies show that it takes five to seven attempts to sustainably change behavior. First, you will walk in the footsteps of this other person who wants to become a bit shaky. But with every step you take, you will come closer to your goal - and enjoy the experience of success!
expert
Dr. Monica Ramirez Basco, 49, is a clinical psychologist, author, lecturer and an internationally recognized expert in cognitive behavioral therapy. She teaches at the University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center.
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