- Who pays attention to his choice of words, has less stress
- Less "must"
- Not so often "not"
- Gemach, made!
- To get to the point!
- A bit of peace
- Talk in complete sentences
Who pays attention to his choice of words, has less stress
A mini language course shows how we can decelerate our lives with the right expressions.
Vocabulary words like "tormenting" or "grueling" activate our pain center in the brain as well as pin pricks - this has been researched by psychologists at the University of Jena. By contrast, positive formulations have a harmonizing effect, says linguist Mechthild von Scheurl-Defersdorf. Together with a doctor, she has developed the Lingva Eterna language and communication concept. It recommends mindfulness with every word. Because with the appropriate language we decelerate our lives and can even avoid quarrels.
Less "must"
I have to, I have to, I have to: That's the standard language now, when you talk about his plans. "I have to go to Berlin tomorrow." With such sentences we only put ourselves under pressure. Watch for yourself how often you use the word "must" and how you feel about it. Better for happiness and for the deceleration of everyday life : "I will go to Berlin tomorrow" or "I want to clean the windows today, " said the linguist.
Not so often "not"
It is important to know how hard the brain is doing with negations. No one can read the phrase "Do not imagine a green Easter bunny" without thinking of one. Conversely, if you want to be punctual, you should rather forego the sentence "I do not want to be late". Better: "I want to be there in time." Even the advice "Do not be afraid" should be deleted from the vocabulary if you want to calm someone down. Better are phrases like "you are well prepared" or "you have often shown that you can do it".
Gemach, made!
"I'll do it fast" - something like that will easily slip out of us. However, the routine use of the word "fast" only spreads hectic, we ourselves feel driven and come under stress. The same applies to phrases like "very short" or "Can you just ...?". Decelerate, however, we can z. B. with the words "Gemach, made" or "I'll gladly take time".
To get to the point!
Others can not always follow your thoughts? Speak in short, clear sentences - so you can sort yourself better. And lower the voice at the end of the sentence. Then the listener knows that a thought is over. Those who habitually leave the voice on top do not get to the point in the truest sense of the word. People with constantly increasing melody do not find an end in other areas of life either.
A bit of peace
We long for harmony, but our language is often surprisingly brutal: Callers are "strangled" on the phone, projects are "attacked" and ideas "targeted", "heavy guns" are raised, plans are "decisive for the war" - and if we have fun, it is a "Momsgaudi". With such words, we activate unconscious storage and aggression and aggravate and slow down in everyday life. Also, instead of making a "suggestion", you can give a "recommendation". Peaceful formulations pay off, the linguist affirms: "Midwives report that births are easier if women" get "their children and can not 'get' them."
Talk in complete sentences
Whoever begins to pay more attention to his language quickly realizes how often he begins sentences without completing them, and how often he jumps across his mind: "Last week's conversation - you know, we have this new customer - at least, I thought so, and my boss thought that was a good idea ... "Make it clear that listeners can only process one image per sentence. And: always speak in complete sentences! By the way, in women more often than in men, the "me" disappears from the sentences: "I hung up my laundry quickly, " "Go shopping now." The effect: "The omission of the subject leaves you in your own thinking and speaking on the track, " says Mechthild von Scheurl-Defersdorf. Another linguistic stumbling block: Passive sentences such. B. "On Sunday the laundry is done". It is not clear who the acting person is. Shorter and more understandable are active sentences: "On Sunday we do the laundry."
Book tip: "A couple - one word, better talk to each other", Mechthild of Scheurl-Defersdorf, Kreuz Verlag, 16, 99 Euro
Author: JULIA MEYERDIERCKS
