I have encountered many types of strong women in my life. But they also have their weaknesses.
Photo: iStock
- But where is the weakness of the strong women?
- Is weakness really the right opponent of strength in this context?
- But how do you manage to get this unbeatable whole back into yourself?
And weaknesses are good! Believe me. I explain it to you.
Strength is a very abstract concept under which each person will imagine something different.
I have encountered many types of strong women in my life.
They are almost indestructible and unshakable in their energy, enthusiasm and humor.
They are very good at clenching their teeth and getting up again, they are great energy suppliers, they have an incredible organizational skill, they are always a solution to every problem, they are almost never in a bad mood and whatever happens to them, they can push it aside and carry on and against give themselves a certain hardness to the day.
Strong women have often been at the same turning points in their lives as many other people, but at these intersections they have always decided to choose a path and go further.
Maybe because they had or because no one was there to support them or give them a break.
Most of the time, it has had positive consequences so that they have learned that it is good that they are robust, independent and fast. They realize that they are successful, maybe even that they are admired for it.
So they always make more of it, because that's how we are humans, we like to repeat a pattern of behavior with which we have had good experiences. The things that we did badly with, we prefer to leave to the left and rarely try them a second or a third time.
But where is the weakness of the strong women?
Very heretical I could say now: in her strength.
Many of us have lost our sense of being weak, because that is the petty-minded behavioral pattern that was not as successful in our perception as the other.
Praised be what helps, the rest we actually do not care - or?
Fortunately, we are now looking at many complex issues of life more holistically.
And in the sense of holisticness, we should ask ourselves the question: What is the weakness for? Does she have any sense? Why is there in this world?
When we are in a balanced state - let's call it in balance - then we move in a relaxed manner between our two original areas of tension: ratio and emotion, that is, between the heart and the head, or reason and feeling.
Everywhere these poles are in life and they are always important.
No sun and moon no day and night, no ebb and flow, no blossoming and passing away.
Without "evil" we would not know what is "good", without resting we could not make an effort, without suffering we would not appreciate the joy and without death, life would have no meaning.
And the strength? It is said that many want to do without the weakness?
The strength is more in the field of reason and the weakness in the emotional, so emotional.
We should not separate reason and feeling, so maybe strength and weakness.
Is weakness in this context the right opponent of strength at all?
In this case, speak better of strong and soft, that sounds a lot friendlier and more welcoming. And do not forget that language, that is how you express yourself about something, always carries with it your interpretation and thus your dealings with it
If we become aware of all these issues and then look critically at ourselves again, do we still find ourselves as strong as before, or do we realize that we could actually be missing a half to be truly strong?
If we affectionately connect the head and the heart, so that we can draw from their full strength, the affirmative acceptance of strong and soft, which can not be excluded.
When I realize that, I have a lot about my image of strong women, and I give it to myself too, thinking.
Once again, I looked around at how many strong women I still discover with this new awareness, and I found two more in my immediate environment - I was not one of them.
Two women who are unmistakably independent, decisive, robust, combative, intoxicating and tough, but who are equally wonderfully feminine, emotional, vulnerable, tender and warm.
Absolutely exceptional!
But how do you manage to bring this unbeatable whole back into yourself?
The moment you develop an awareness that you can only be complete with both, you automatically begin to change your view of it.
Suddenly you look at the well-worn, well-known and comfortable path of eternal hardness and strength a little differently, and the so pathetically, little-trodden path of softness and warmth returns to consciousness.
You start actively deciding how to respond to situations. As always? Fast, hard and jagged or soft, waiting, emotional, maybe even vulnerable.
Why should it be good to be vulnerable to something?
The vulnerability can only be faded out by fading out the emotions, and a life with a reduced emotional world is perfectly possible, but it lags far behind the potential of what life holds, and many things in life become inaccessible.
Since I recognized my small strength deficit in strength for myself, a picture * hangs in my office, which describes for me the condition, to stand in my full power and to shine as a whole. It depends so much that I can look at it very often and I have written in large letters on it:
I CAN HEAT THEM!
I see this picture so often that it has become part of my consciousness and whenever I stand at a fork in the road and decide between rationality and emotionality or between strength and "weakness", this picture pushes me like a small stop sign Awareness, so that I have time to consider whether I would like to go back and forth on my well-known path, or if I could also try out the other in this situation.
After all, there is nothing better than treating yourself to something that is holistic, perfectly equipped.
If you also have the occasional feeling of being too hard on yourself or others, of losing your feminine and warmth because of your strength and strength, then treat yourself here and there with a little bit of it.
Say it aloud:
I allow myself warmth!
I allow myself softness!
I allow myself weakness!
How does it feel?
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* The work with images and so-called Motto goals according to Maja Storch is a method that can be used in coaching and with which I like to work, because it is incredibly resource-strengthening and motivating.
This text is a guest post by Susanne Henkel. Susanne is a systemic coach and entrepreneur. She works nationwide as a coach. Her practice is located in Neu-Isenburg, near Frankfurt am Main. Her offer is aimed both at private persons, who come to her with purely private topics, as well as at companies, which book her for executive and team coachings. Susanne Henkel always pays special attention to assisting her clients in exercising their own gut feeling so that decisions and solutions can always be made on a rational and emotional level. The reason for this sounds as plausible as obvious: according to Susanne Henkel, all solutions or decisions that are made in such a balance between the head and heart are easy to implement for people and fully motivated.
Further information about Susanne Henkel and coaching can be found here. There are more articles from her on her blog: www.talkabout-blog.de
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