Recommended, 2020

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Cup of fear! How do I find the right bra size?

Our author has a problem with her bras. Because they just do not hold what they should hold. Now, Charlotte Kapal fears that she has been the wrong bra size for years

Every second woman wears a bra of the wrong size.
Photo: Ghislain & Marie David de Lossy / cultura / Corbis

wearing. If so, how do you find out?

If you, dear reader, are among the women who do not need to wear a bra, I would like to say that you are blessed. I wish I was like you and could do without these things. But if I did that, I might get the impression that I'm sneaking puppies under my T-shirt. It's better if everything is kept in check and at the right height. And so for about 20 years I have been forced to stow my cleavage in a brassiere. Only that, dear reader, I just do not want to succeed.

The problem: In pretty much all bras that I own, my bosom pops in the middle of the cups. Two-thirds of my bust size are therefore stowed away permanently, a third is squeezed out in the form of a "V" s. Fleshed "Victory" sign, so to speak. That is easily apparent through each top. So I do not carry puppies at stomach height around with me - but it looks like I've put two sleeping hamsters on my breasts. One left, one right. Embarrassing.

Now I do not wear Wonderbra . I also did not tie my bra extra tight or set the straps to be particularly tiny so they would cut into my shoulders. No, I wear my bras relaxed in my house and yard size: 80 B. How do I know that this is my size? From my friends and colleagues. Because: If my friend P., who obviously has more breasts than me, wears a C-cup and the boyish colleague S. an A-cup, then I'm a B. Of course. And since I am definitely thicker than S. (70), but really thinner than P. (90), I am super served with a 80. Which means: There must be something hormonal, why the 80 B-things suddenly do not suit me anymore.

"Nonsense, " says a friend of mine. "You're probably wearing the wrong size." What helps? I should be professionally measured - in a shop for underwear . "Since a lady measures everything and - sir - you know your size, " she explains to me and puts my pronounced sense of shame on alert. "Does the lady come near me?" I want to know. And I hope that a very, very old, white-haired woman will ask me into a dressing room, pull the curtain on and, completely clothed, I'll have to rest for a minute like X-rays. And (sir!) I know my right size. But my girlfriend says: "Sure, it comes close to you." "But that does not touch me, does it?", I want to know and pray inwardly that the people in the underwear retailers now also have such a measuring device as the one with which I recently checked the square meter of my flat. "Yes, it is likely she will touch you, " I hear instead. "Oh, shit, I can not do that, " I reply. "But that always works in the shops, without an appointment." "Oh, I certainly can not."

So what now? Can not the "sleeping hamster" problem be solved without unwanted body contact? But! After intensive internet research ("Every second woman wears the wrong bra size " - poof, relief) I found a way out: the online bra check. And on . Under "Our tips for you" there is the point "Determine your size". And I do that now.

First, it's about the back view when I'm wearing one of my plopped bras. There are three options to choose from. I click: "The back of your bra is flabby and likes to slide in the direction of the shoulders, and you feel like you're not holding it." Krass: That's why "BH is too big". Wow, so my breast is smaller than I thought. Can only mean: My thighs and my butt are in truth also totally tiny. A wonderful test, I jubilate and click on "Confirm".

Next question: "How does the basket feel? Tell us if ..." On the far right outside is my answer: "... your breasts bulge, the bow cuts in and the middle bridge between the cups lifts off the body." The Chantelle people did not have to formulate it that hard either. Although I carry hamsters on the breasts, but that does not mean that I have no feelings. And what is above my answer confuses me totally: "too tight". As? First too big, then too narrow? I still click on "Confirm". And then it appears, my result: "75 D".

Oh God. "D" sounds so huge that I can not be happy about the good news about my underbust girth. I do not have any drawers that fit such big bras! Does not Pamela Anderson have "75 D"? I google stars with my bra size . I think: Katy Perry, Scarlett Johansson, Daniela Katzenberger . Mrs. Anderson has "double-D".

And so I will soon buy my first bra in 75 D. If everything goes well and nothing pops out, I might go to the second test on the Chantelle website: "Determine your pants size." I'm really scared of that. D-fear, so to speak.