Recommended, 2024

Editor'S Choice

Adopted woman cares for her mother without her knowledge

Phyllis Whitsell went in search of her birth mother and nursed her for years.
Photo: Phyllis Whitsell / Facebook

Care without limits: The search for the birth mother

Phyllis Whitsell is adopted. When the woman locates her biological mother, she takes care of her without her knowing who the nurse really is.

When Phyllis Whitsell is four, she is adopted. Even though her foster family takes care of her, she always carries the burden of not knowing where she came from. Her adoptive mother rejects any questions. She just tells Phyllis that her birth mother Bridget Ryan died of tuberculosis, a lie the girl could never believe. But her foster family is silent. The older she gets, the stronger Phyllis becomes curiosity.

As the little girl slowly grows into an adult woman and begins an apprenticeship as a nurse and midwife, she learns that adopted children are often hushed up to protect them from reality. But Phyllis no longer needs protection. She wants to find out the truth and goes in search of her birth mother.

By now she is 59 years old. The last nine years of her life she sacrificed the care of an old lady - her birth mother. Phyllis Whitsell not only learned where she came from but also learned why her origins were hidden from her. BridgetRyan was an alcoholic.

In search of her Phyllis crossed different stages of her life. She visited the orphanage where she was brought at the tender age of eight months. She met people who remembered her mother, people who did not tell her the whole truth again. Nevertheless, Phyllis searched on his own.

Until the day she suddenly finds herself at the doorstep of the house of a woman named Tipperary Mary, known as a problem case and alcoholic - and her birth mother. Although Phyllis is well aware at this point in time why her origins have always kept a secret, she does not turn away. She takes on the physically and mentally unstable woman she had once approved for adoption.

Phyllis starts to hide behind her job. She approaches her biological mother as a nurse, re-dresses the woman, washes and cares for her wounds. Even when the adopted woman talks to Mary about her five children, including herself, she keeps herself covered. Until her death, her birth mother does not know who is standing in front of her day after day and cares for her.

Phyllis Whitsell consciously makes that decision. She knows that she can not have her biological mother destroy her foster family or leave Tipperary Mary alone. So she chooses her own compromise and takes on the role of a nurse. Whole nine years, the daughter cares for her birth mother without their knowledge.

After her death, Phyllis writes down her story in a book. In search of her origin, the adopted woman not only found her birth mother, but also herself. She still works in a nursing home today.

Top